Midnight thoughts

In order for me to write on my blog I have to been in a certain state of mind or have a specific feeling. I have thought about “updating” you guys on what has been happening, but haven’t really been in the mood for writing. I have had so much going on in my life, which I needed to sort out first. You know basically figure out, what to do with my life. A lot of things have changed and I have done a lot of thinking on what it is I want. I have had these thoughts before but for the first time in my life I face the reality off that I can’t keep riding my bike forever! I don’t know what I image as a kid, but all I ever wanted was to be a professional bike rider. I accomplished my child hood...

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Colors of the wind...! and NO it's not Pocahontas.

After some bumpy days, I'm back to me again. It's nice! My little black notebook has been my faithful companion, when I needed to give my self space. At times I feel very rootless, and as I has mentioned before I'm having difficulties finding home - a place to belong. I like my apartment, and it feels more like home than what I shared with my x, but I don't feel settled or resident.  I still have so many dreams and desires I would like to do before I settle down, it's like I'm awake for the first time in years discovering what I use to dream about, what my hopes for my future were. Now I just got to figure out a way to put them into practise.  I went out with my camera here...

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Status: Out is always better than home

So here a bit more than 24 hours after the Danish Championship in RR, am I stuck with a annoying feeling off something is not right… I know that the legendary Pøt Mølle and I don’t get along, but I had hoped for more, and Saturday evening I could stop thinking on what went wrong! Or if something did went wrong…! The truth is I didn’t have any expectations, no hope just fears…. Even though it irritates me so much when I’m not cable of performing the way I would like to, and even though the little voice in my head, tries to explain to me why things at the moment on the bike are going like Sh.. Mentally I can cope with many things, but it hits with 110% when riding doesn’t go well. At the moment...

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Clocking in... a new chapter!

So just because the blog has been then just silent, it dosen’t mean that nothing have happen in my life, on the other hand, there has been almost too much. But all these changes and no time for reflection and writing has been good. To cut to the bone, after ca. 4 years of relationship Jacob and I split. No matter what it’s never easy breaking up with some one, and it takes so much time and energy, even though I was relatively settled with the matter. Something happen with me in Belgium, I don’t know what… I can’t put a finger on it, but when I returned to my “home” in Denmark, something was changed, and I couldn’t feel at home in what use to be my home. It was very frustrating and I...

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I got a plan... at least for now...

I have been wanting to write a something, and I have several times started on a new post, but in some ways I never seemed to be able to set down and get it down on paper. Why I don't know, time has just been flying the last few weeks, which has been so nice. > busy is good. Life has starting to normalize which I still don't know how to relate to it. A lot of things has changed during the last months and weeks, and I'm still working on getting the whole puzzle into one piece, but I'm getting there. It has taking it's thorn, but I'm slowly starting to figure it out.  I have had some big dilemmas trying to figure out want to do - how do I want to live my life - want kind of job/education/"career"...

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More important things

When reality strikes back, it can hurt! Yesterday I had a aftershock, and once again I found myself wondering/fearing about the future, and what it will bring/contain, and how I should relate or react to it. It's funny because I wasn't feeling sad, and I had spend some great days together with my family and friends, but that was at least what I thought, but sometimes body and mind operates in two completely different ways.  That combined with 2 good night out, and a tired mind and body, my shield fell down, and I let a good friend in. Not once during the last few days had I thought about it, but apparently unconsciously I had, and my because my mind too busy during something ells my body...

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Ready Steady Action GO

Sometimes, or in my case often, there isn't a long complicated path between taking a decision and then bringing it into practise. Therefore Saturday I was at the start line at the "local" mountainbike race in Silkeborg. Don't know if you can call it local with 1200 participates, but fun indeed it was. It was my first "meeting" with my MTB and I finished working on it around 10pm. The weather was a bad - really bad, with heavy and on going showers through out the race. It was my first ever marathon race and first ever tour in the MTB, so I didn't know what to expect and have to behave.  I'm definitely not a long-distance mountain bike rider, in fact I think it was the rainy weather...

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