19. april 2012

I got a plan... at least for now...

I have been wanting to write a something, and I have several times started on a new post, but in some ways I never seemed to be able to set down and get it down on paper. Why I don't know, time has just been flying the last few weeks, which has been so nice. > busy is good.

Life has starting to normalize which I still don't know how to relate to it. A lot of things has changed during the last months and weeks, and I'm still working on getting the whole puzzle into one piece, but I'm getting there. It has taking it's thorn, but I'm slowly starting to figure it out. 

I have had some big dilemmas trying to figure out want to do - how do I want to live my life - want kind of job/education/"career" do I want to pursue. I have always been Nikoline - the bike rider. Ever since I can remember I have been socialised with cycling, and it's okay, but I'm starting to get there, where I kind off just want to be ME!

When I look back I have done some pretty funny stuff, if you can put it that way. I have always done want I desire the most, and I have always had fun doing it. My life so far has been a big mix of training, working (otherwise no money to race for), travelling/exploring new countries and meeting people from all over the world - all this related to my cycling activities. I have been so privileged, and I don't feel that I have missed out on anything, on the other hand I have gained so much in stead. I'm still not ready to leave it all behind, and properly never will be. I simply love riding my bike to much. So far I have had 16 years of racing together with my bike.... 

But I have realized that I in the future want to do something more, I want to be more than I rider. I need to have more or different aspects and contents in my life. After a lot of THINKING during my stay in Belgium and returning to DK my future questions now has answers. For the first time in many years I sent out my first application for a new study out, I didn't get in, but I'll try again next year. I was quite sad when I got the message, because I felt ready for a new chapter in my life... don't know if I make any sense, but it has been hard to find, that one thing I want to do for the rest of the life, (beside riding my bike) I can't afford riding my bike forever... I have been pleased with doing what I really love for many years, and finding a "replacement" for that has been hard, and cost many emotions and tears, but I'm slowly accepting the fact, that I can have just the same amount of fun,enjoyment and achievements elsewhere... and maybe even more...! who knows? I have accepted that my life is running on narrow and winding roads, and no brad highways. I will work hard to improve my skills and then apply again next year, and after some more thinking I will apply one more place as well ;-) 

So now I got a plan, and I'll try to stick to it, but as the impulsive and easy going person I am, I wonder how long it will last... One/A plan or idea is better than nothing. 

A lesson cycling has taught me during the last many years, is the importance off doing something you really love and desires. 


  • 19. april 2012 kl. 12.30

    Good luck and keep working hard! BTW, I didn't forget your poster, it's just things have been really busy recently because of the book.


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